Handy Hair Tips

Are you Aware of what your daily or weekly hair care regiment consists of lets talk about Shampoo.
Most shampoo has an chemical which contains SLS or AlS Which may be know to you, as Sulfate.
Sulfate Free Shampoo Should be The only Shampoo, You Use on Your hair.

What SLS is…in layman’s terms? There is an ingredient is every shampoo and every “cleaning” agent whether it be for the body, for the hair, for the garage, for the bathroom, for the face,etc., called the “SURFACTANT”. The surfactant in shampoos are surface active ingredients, meaning they can interact with a surface. The chemical nature of a surfactant allows it to surround and trap oily materials from surfaces. One portion of the molecule is oil compatible soluble while the other is water soluble. In other words the surfactant is the detergent – or the “cleaning portion” of the formula.The surfactant is the portion of the formula that can have the harshness of the formula beCAUSE it is the detergent. Detergents CAN be harsh, but they can also be ‘gentle’. For the past 20 years almost every shampoo has used the surfactant: Sodium Lauryl Sulfate SLS or Ammonium Lauryl Sulfate ALS, why? they are super – super cheap AND they make lots and lots of foam and bubbles.

We expect a lot from shampoos, its funny a product like that which you use frequently we really know nothing about.Unfortunately, it is not easy to tell a good shampoo from a poor one. Cost, fragrance, and lots of foam is what most we look for in shampoo products. Lather and foam does absolutely nothing to make a shampoo a good one, but they often get the most attention.Lots of bubbles has zero to do with the quality of shampoo you must let that one thing ‘go’ please. Foaming occurs when surfactant molecules gather around air instead of oil. The result is millions of tiny bubbles. Obviously, the air bubbles are using the surfactants that should be removing dirt and oil .The truth is, lots of foamy lather only means too much shampoo was used.Excess foam equals waste. Sebum and other oils quickly destroy foam. Ideally, the head should have just enough lather to lubricate the scalp and hair. This will help your fingers massage the shampoo more effectively into the hair. (Fragrances is not a good way of evaluating shampoos)
Use Sulfate Free Shampoo.
As ZANTA Platinum Stylist I promote healthy hair, as well educating my clients and team on proper hair care regiments for the care of your hair and your ZANTA Extensions.
Try a Sulfate free Shampoo on your Tresses & Extensions today.
Feel free to inbox me on a list of SLS Free Products.

WHATS LOVE GOT TO DO WITH IT? HOW TO STOP FINDING LOVE IN ALL THE WRONG PLACES!

First of all i want to thank you for taking the time to check out my very first blog in the AskRo Davis series. This topic of love is complex and so fundamental to every aspect of our lives that i wanted to give it an entire week to really breakdown down the topic…point by point…so that we can make some serious progress individually and collectively in this area! Here we go…Whats love got to do with it? It actually has everything to do with it…it being this seemly endless cycle of failed expectations and disappointing results in this area! For me on a personal level I understand this topic all too well because I have had my own share of failed attempts. Its very frustrating and time consuming when we don’t have this area of our lives in order. Its crazy how we can have all of these things in order; career, house, nice cars, lavish vacations etc…yet we say to ourselves…God why cant you just bless me with this one thing! The truth of the matter is that there is really nothing left for God to do in this area, He has already done it so it is now up to us to make it happen for ourselves!

The first problem that ive noticed, and this is major…all of us have a different definition of what love is! We really. as important and fundamental as it is to our long term happiness, have never really determined what that actually looks like in reality! We are relying on a feeling to sweep us off our feet into a wonderland of bliss. The ironic thing is that that actually happens but we aren’t able to sustain it for some odd reason! Here is why-In truth…most of us have a very dysfunctional perception of love that is not only twisted but is filtered through our own history of experiences and most importantly…our own self esteem! This is why they say love is blinding! When we are in that moment of bliss we are blinded to what everybody else can apparently see so clearly! LOL. Everyone reading this blog has been guilty of it…we say to ourselves and even worse to others…how in the hell does he or she not see that this relationship is toxic and most likely gonna end in disaster! The writing is usually right there on the wall for everyone else but to us it makes perfect sense! This is because depending on what we feel as though we deserve and what we have experienced up until this point in our lives…if it has all been mostly negative and dysfunctional….we by way of the law of attraction will continue to attract more of what we say that we don’t want on the surface…continuing to blame others every time things don’t work out.

If you really think about it…most of us grew up in broken single parent homes, with a mother who struggled with the very same issues that we are facing today! It really doesn’t matter how much we say on the surface that we wont or don’t want to repeat or end up like our parents…usually we often do! Subconsciously we learn to imitate their behavior patterns in ways that seem different but in the end are exactly the same. its not about what we do physically…its the principle of how we operate in relationship to things that links our behavior. In other words…its really all the same thing just in a different form! We are all creatures of habit at the end of the day. Here the best example that i can think of to explain how we can get trapped into self destructive cycles unconsciously without even trying. We all know someone who has been chronically in and out of prison their entire lives…in fact according to system studies…its reported that if a person has been locked up for 10 years or more they become whats called institutionalized! This means that they began to fear freedom more than they do incarceration and therefore every time they get out of jail, 82% of the time they get locked right back up with in the first 2 to 3 years on some dumb shit that as we look from the outside looking in…we say to ourselves and others…what the hell were they thinking in the first place! This is because it is the behavior pattern that is blinding not the specific action! Love is a way of being that is expressed in everything that we do whether we like it or not…and it can translate itself into a behavior pattern that causes us to recidivate into a prison of unhappiness. WHY you may be asking yourself? Why would someone choose to get locked back up when freedom is their birth right! Here the answer…its not about imprisonment or freedom…its about their comfort zone! Our comfort zone is a way of surviving…much like you might imagine someone who is locked might develop over the years. To walk strong amongst criminals most of us would become callous and hardened to the environment if nothing else…just as a defense mechanism. Its called the ability to adapt and overcome! Now after prolonged exposure to this environment we get comfortable in it and uncomfortable in a functional one. The roles reverse and reality all of a sudden gets twisted thus blinding us to the obvious. If this can happen to a prisoner in just 10 years of prolonged exposure…what about someone who grew up in a dsyfunctional home for 18-21 years in the formative stages of our lives? We become institutionalized into unhappiness and failure! We want things to change but wouldn’t know how to act if they did…or more importantly…we don’t know how to act in order to create the reality that will make us happy…so what happens is this…even if we meet a person that could make us happy, we will most likely sabotage it until we are right back where we started! We cant see that were really to blame…and we will most like blame others for making us unhappy…just like most criminals will blame the system for locking them up! Its not so much about the system as much as it is about the system of our lives and mindset.

The question now becomes…how do we break this pattern? In order to do so we’ve got to even deeper so hold on to your seats and walk with me! To change any behavior we have to understand how the mind works…at our core we must understand that it is about our associations and how we define love. Understand this principle…human beings will do more to avoid pain than we will the desire for pleasure! Most of our experience with love has been good at first but ended in pain! Therefore in an effort to protect our very being and fragile hearts…we have associated extended love with pain! Therefore when it feels too right…something kicks in called fear and we start sabotaging the relationship so that we can get back into our comfort zone. While we want the pleasure of true love…we would rather take a dose of this pain upfront than to get sucked into an even greater perceived pain at the end of the day because in truth we cant even visualize a continuous stream of happiness! Most of us have no experience with it for any significant period of time. Its sad but the truth! So step one is to really think about how we have and what we have associated love with in our heart of hearts…if that association is negative then we must reprogram that core thought or we will keep destroying our relationships unconsciously! We have to understand this…while love can hurt…it can also heal and lift us up! it is our birthright to be happy…not sad…therefore we are living other than Gods true intention for our lives!

Next we have to be willing to step outside of our comfort zone so that we can get it right…even if this means giving up being right! Remember… To have something that we have never had…we must do something that we have never done! That something might simply be…forgiving a person when they screw up or for once in our lives we give the other person the benefit of the doubt in situations where we feel like were both right and justified in our stance!
From there we have to be willing to endure the process called love! I want to take the liberty and redefine our expectations in this area! We have been misled by Hollywood and romance novels to think that true love is an emotion only…something we feel rather than something we earn as a badge of honor for sticking through until the end! Breakdowns create breakthroughs! we must always remember that! Sometimes people come into our lives to give us the standard of what we will and what we wont accept! Learn to move on without malice…forgiveness is not so much for the person…its for us…so that we can love again! we owe that to ourselves to get up and keep trying no matter what or how many times we fail!

In the end….what is the definition of love? The answer is this…its relative to each one of us as individuals and therefore unique! this is why we will never understand why this or that person stayed so long in something that was obviously not healthy! Now this brings me to my final point…Before we decide to fall in love or even if were already in love…its important to take an honest look at who we are and and make the decision that despite the fact that we’ve never experienced it…we definitely deserve to have it…it is an inalienable birthright to all of us no matter how much we screw up…we still deserve it! We must also accept the fact that Nobody can really make us happy…that’s something that we have to seek within…once we feel deserving and love ourselves enough we will only attract people in our lives that compliment our core belief and self worth! Nugget…The people in our lives that are close to us are really a reflection of how we feel about ourselves. therefore there’s no sense in pointing the finger and blaming them for our unhappiness…at best they are just the messenger helping us to see our true pain or joy on the inside made manifest! True love is closer than we think…in fact its just a choice and a journey away! I hope this first blog has been both informative and helpful~ Thanks for this moment…what are your questions or comments! I live on your feedback…Ro…NO CEILINGS!

Why Men Cheat And What You Can Do As a Woman To Stop Us! Part I

WHY DO MEN CHEAT…AND WHAT YOU CAN DO TO STOP IT?

Why do men cheat? Its a very sensitive subject, one that requires a knowledge of the history of humanity, a window into a mans logic, and most of all an open mind. Contrary to popular belief, we don’t cheat for any of the reasons that most women think we do! Most women think that men cheat because we think that they are inadequate, for a lack of love or that the relationship must be suffering on some level. IN MOST CASES THIS IS NOT THE TRUTH! Not knowing the root cause of the issue is the reason why you cant solve the problem. Its like being a doctor and misdiagnosing the patient! The medicine that most women prescribe usually fails because the issue is not in the relationship! Since most women think it is either with them or the relationship, they prescribe medicines that dont work like; creating the fear of loss in the man, scare tactics, mind games, and doing things like one of my facebook friends suggested…which was to get freakier in bed! Sounds good…especially the freaky part but in the end it will not stop the behavior!

The question now becomes…”If its not me, its not the relationship and I cant screw it out of him…then what the hell is the answer?” I thought you guys would never ask a man! Let me explain…Most men don’t even know whats compelling them to cheat which is why they cant stop if they tried! All we know is that the desire to conquer new territory has driven and continues to drive men to new heights…on all all levels! Pussy…especially new pussy…is like gasoline to a man! It keeps us striving to do more, be successful and conquer our fears in every area! That’s the positive side of the equation…no here’s the negative side of it…especially if were in a relationship! The family man inside of us calls us to start a family at some point. Since we live in a monogamous society we know that we can only have one so we try to figure out who best suits our needs and likeness and we settle down. No problems right? Wrong! Soon afterward…the behavior pattern that we had before of juggling multiple women seems to resurface and were now, “cheating” on the one we love. The core issue is NATURE VERSUS NURTURE! It isnt anything that you are or are not doing to satisfy or push us away! This inspiration to step outside of the relationship shows up in our minds primarily as lust or desire in most cases. On the surface, those women who have a low opinion on the integrity and character of a man will say, “I knew it! Yall just cant keep your dicks in your pants!” My answer to that theory is this…maybe…but maybe not!

The desire to have multiple women doesn’t stem from a purely sexual source. On the surface it sure seems that way…but deeper insight into the evolution of humanity and true nature of man brings it into a more spiritual place. Heres where our discussion gets deep! In nature there are 7 women created to every one man…so there are 6 women left over no matter what you do. Therefore I assert that if God truly intended one man to be with one woman he would have made the odds more even to satisfy the demands of his creation. To figure out Gods true intentions for mans marital status, we can study the biblical accounts and study the life cycles of the mans ability to procreate versus the woman’s ability to do so.

All of God’s mighty men had wives and concubines! From Moses, Abraham, David, Solomon until and through the days of Jesus…the accepted marital system of the day was polygamy. Even unto this day the eastern world, where we all originated from, still accepts polygamy as the legal form of marriage. It is the Western or Western dominated world that endorses monogamy as the only acceptable form of marriage! When you look at the numbers you’ll also see that the divorce rate in monogamous cultures is far greater than it is in polygamous cultures and the tolerance of women on a sexual or perverted level is way below that of our culture. This is due once again to nature versus nurture! Weve been nurtured to be monogamous but our nature calls us to be polygamous! This is why on the surface we say monogamy rules but behind close doors our lower nature governs some of us to do all sorts of dysfunctional things! Besides all that consider this…if God intended a man to find one woman and settle down for a lifetime and never have sex with another woman then why did he limit the woman’s capacity to procreate after a certain point? Why not make us even since his intentions were for one man for every one woman? Now your saying…”That’s the old testament! In the new covenant God believes in monogamy!” My answer to that is this…I thought that God never changes? I was taught that hes the same in the beginning as he is in the end! We can debate this till the end of time and im sure that we will…but the facts are the facts!

Now that we have laid a foundation for the real meat of the discussion lets deal with the mindset of the man. In truth ladies…because managing multiple relationships is in our DNA…when we cheat we really don’t feel like were cheating! It actually feels natural. I have never heard too many men if any say that they are gonna cheat because their wife, girl friend or significant other is not up to par! We cheat because there are different parts of a mans mind that ultimately needs to be nurtured…and not just the lower part. This thought is the toughest for most women. The argument is that …”I should be enough…all that my man needs to be satisfied!” The truth is…”YOU ARE!” You satisfy us for what you provide to us in most cases! As I said before…we’ve been nurtured to accept monogamy but our nature calls us to polygamy! The best way to describe the nature of a man and the nature of the woman is this…Men are like farmers! We can plant multiple seeds in several gardens and tend to them all! Women are like the earth…you have been blessed with equipment that gives you the ability to nurture and raise to life, one seed at a time. In fact, agriculture would define the act of planting 2 seeds in the same hole as an abomination…while at the same time call a farmer who can plant and nurture multiple seeds at the same time and make them all grow strong…a star among stars in the farming world! Sound familiar?!

This is why it is hard for you to divide your emotions. In a mans mind, because we do have that capacity…we don’t feel in our heart of hearts like we are cheating. Its more difficult but not impossible for a woman to sleep around because your emotions get involved. For us in the beginning its mostly physical! Make sense?

Before we discuss the solution to the cheating virus…is the ground work for the perceived illness clear? Before we

go on…id like to discuss the first part of our discussion fueled by this blog! Tune in tomorrow for the second part on what women can do to stop it! Than you for tuning in to my brand new blog…AskRoDavis! Dont forget to follow me on twitter @AskRoDavis